The battle of the release

Have you ever wanted something very badly, worked very hard for it, and then, just before crossing the finish line, felt a sickening pang of terror in the bottom of your belly as if you don’t really want to cross the finish line?  I’ve been reading a lot lately, mostly about dreams, and achieving them.  It’s been said that if your dreams don’t terrify you, they aren’t big enough.  I am not going to lie – I am literally terrified about the release of Masquerade.  I mean, what if people hate it?  What if someone judges me because of what I wrote?  I was very excited for it, and now that it’s hear, I’m literally sick in my stomach thinking about it.

It’s almost as if I want to say, “okay, I achieved it”.   I got the book to the printer.  Good enough for me.

On one hand, I want people to buy it, read it, and be impacted forever (in a good way).  On the other hand, I don’t want people to know I did it – which is one reason why I have a pen name.

In my heart of hearts, I know that to be obedient to God is far more important than being afraid; and I truly believe that this work is an act of obedience in telling a part of a story that is bigger than myself.   Yet if I am honest with all of you, I am a nervous wreck.

So I’m going to ask you all to pray for me as I cross this finish line – my ask is that God will give me the courage I need to take the giant step with grace.  I pray, also, that people really understand the message in the book – that there is Hope in Christ Jesus, even for our silliest fears.

To Him all the Glory,

Blessings to you,



Author: Journey-For-Life

I am a musician, an engineer, a mentor; my desire is to leave things better than I found them; I am a sister, daughter, wife, mother, aunt, friend. Suicide breaks my heart; Cancer breaks my heart; Human trafficking breaks my heart; Seeing people make bad life decisions breaks my heart. I am thankful for the One True and Living God who saved me from myself and, through His Son Jesus Christ, has saved from my sins; I am confidently persistent, passionately determined and boldly creative so that I may inspire others to live a life that ultimately matters.

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